The Shit Your BF Says or Does
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My boyfriend- "You're not stupid. You're a girl."

#936
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Sep 5, 2012 09:47 AM - Misc - by Kate (woman)

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My boyfriend says, "I was listening to you, but I didn't hear you." WTF?!?

#408
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Jan 30, 2011 02:59 AM - Love - by mari_wink (woman)

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Hey you want to go to Bally's? I just saw a couple of really fat people and thought of you and me.

#392
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Jan 30, 2011 02:20 AM - Health - by Paula (woman)

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If you gave me a car made of diamonds and blowjobs all day, I still wouldn't drink that beer.

#395
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Jan 30, 2011 02:20 AM - Love - by Lulu (woman)

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if your guy turns to u and says this....
*BF: Hey babe do u like turkey sausage?
*Girl: Uh.... yeah why?
*BF: then come gobble it up!
And points at his crotch its time to get rid of him!

#984
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Oct 10, 2012 05:58 PM - Breakups - by SRock (woman)

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So last night my boyfriend and I are sitting around a fire with his parents and we were all pretty quiet for a minute, and then my bf's dad stands up and with this Indian accent says, "Me chief Hung Low, first name Hung, last name low" and proceeds to drop his pants and piss on the fire.

#427
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Jan 30, 2011 05:31 AM - Misc - by Ali (woman)

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She's going to hate herself in the morning, but at least she's having fun right now!

#417
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Jan 30, 2011 03:17 AM - Drunk - by Katy (woman)

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An ex once told me that women may have to deal with period issues, but guys have it way worse because they have 'inner butt hair'. When I pressed him on it, he said, 'Do you have any idea how difficult it makes wiping back there?'

#860
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Sep 22, 2011 11:24 PM - Sex - by Joann (woman)

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Women prefer 30 - 45 minutes of foreplay. Men prefer 30 - 45 seconds of foreplay. Men consider driving back to her place as part of the foreplay.

#403
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Jan 30, 2011 02:26 AM - Sex - by Pam (woman)

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"You seemed to be having a wet dream. Then you moaned more in your dream than when having sex with me."

#426
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Jan 30, 2011 05:31 AM - Sex - by Connie (woman)

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So we are lying in bed after I just got him off because I was on my rag and he says: "Babe I think its great! It means theres no babys in there!" as he taps my crotch "keep it coming babe, the more blood the better I always say!"

#489
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Feb 16, 2011 03:23 AM - Sex - by G.access (woman)

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My boyfriend "Girls are lucky, a girl can stick anything up there and it feels just like a dick."

#902
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Feb 4, 2012 12:18 AM - Sex - by KiaCouture (woman)

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While watching a movie I say "I like her dress" he replies "I like her face"!

#901
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Feb 4, 2012 12:18 AM - Misc - by Rhondamarie (woman)

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Look at this shit sucker. Or as they say in Mexico, chuprakaka.

#394
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Jan 30, 2011 02:20 AM - Misc - by Shannon (woman)

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As we are sitting in my BFs bed after I just got him off instead of sex cause I was on my period and he taps my crotch and says babe I think its great!! That means no baby in there. The more blood the better I alway say!!

#490
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Feb 16, 2011 03:28 AM - Sex - by G.access (woman)

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My ex asked, ‘Did you know that glass is made out of water?

#868
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Sep 22, 2011 11:54 PM - Misc - by Jessica (woman)

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The other day in Biology, my teacher tried to explain that semen is comprised mostly of sugar, a blonde girl in the back pipes up “then why does it taste so salty?” She promptly ran out of the classroom with the reddest face. So happy you aren't that stupid, baby!

#841
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Aug 10, 2011 08:44 AM - Sex - by Ashley (woman)

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I was in math class. I raised my hand and while the teacher was helping me, I got a text from my you and my tone is Navi from Legend of Zelda saying “Hey! Listen!” My teacher said without missing a beat, “Not now, Navi, he’s in math class.” Hilarious!

#838
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Aug 10, 2011 08:44 AM - Misc - by Zelda (woman)

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I found out my little sister was a stripper. At the same time, she found out that when I said I was having a "quiet birthday with some friends," what I really meant was "hiring a stripper to jump out of a cake." Wasn't a pretty picture... :(

#845
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Aug 10, 2011 08:45 AM - Drunk - by StrippersSuckNow (woman)

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Boyfriend- "Is lady time over yet?"

#937
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Sep 5, 2012 09:48 AM - Misc - by Kate (woman)

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