The Shit Your BF Says or Does
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if your guy turns to u and says this....
*BF: Hey babe do u like turkey sausage?
*Girl: Uh.... yeah why?
*BF: then come gobble it up!
And points at his crotch its time to get rid of him!

#984
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He's A Keeper! (25) - Dump His Ass! (13)

Oct 10, 2012 05:58 PM - Breakups - by SRock (woman)

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My boyfriend asked me if i was born without a sex and had to choose between being female or male, which would I choose. i said i would be female. He said, "yeah, me too, I'd stick so much stuff up my vagina it would be untrue."

#981
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Sep 27, 2012 10:33 AM - Misc - by Jamiexlou (woman)

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The other day I wrote a to-do list and left it on my BF's table. After he read it he said: "This is the most logical letter you have ever given me."

#963
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Sep 5, 2012 09:51 AM - Misc - by Ruhruh (woman)

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Boyfriend- "Is lady time over yet?"

#937
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Sep 5, 2012 09:48 AM - Misc - by Kate (woman)

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My boyfriend- "You're not stupid. You're a girl."

#936
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Sep 5, 2012 09:47 AM - Misc - by Kate (woman)

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I was complaining about me gaining weight, and having a fat belly, when my boyfriend said, 'hey, don't treat it bad ok, my babies are gonna be there someday"

#907
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Sep 5, 2012 09:46 AM - Love - by bigbelly (woman)

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He says: "Fighting zombies wouldn't be totally awesome, but it wouldn't be the worst way to go out either. Just saying."

#959
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Aug 2, 2012 06:01 AM - Misc - by Tamarhino (woman)

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Me: If you are using my washing machine, why do I still have to do all of your laundry?
Him: "Look between your legs, what do you see?...Exactly."

#939
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May 25, 2012 03:54 AM - Love - by coconutlover (woman)

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My boyfriend "Girls are lucky, a girl can stick anything up there and it feels just like a dick."

#902
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Feb 4, 2012 12:18 AM - Sex - by KiaCouture (woman)

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While watching a movie I say "I like her dress" he replies "I like her face"!

#901
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Feb 4, 2012 12:18 AM - Misc - by Rhondamarie (woman)

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I'm Asian and I have the "Asian Glow" every time I drink. The other day my boyfriend told me, if we ever got stranded in an island, he would keep feeding me alcohol so I will glow and keep it warm for both of us.

#900
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He's A Keeper! (20) - Dump His Ass! (3)

Dec 20, 2011 06:50 AM - Love - by nguyent12 (woman)

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ShitMyBFSays.com Rocks!

#877
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He's A Keeper! (7) - Dump His Ass! (5)

Nov 6, 2011 08:06 AM - Misc - by Stickam (woman)

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My boyfriend thought the purpose of tampons is to alleviate menstrual pain...

#874
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Oct 25, 2011 04:50 AM - Love - by Beanz (woman)

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We were showering together and I realized he was putting conditioner on his pubes and chest hair. He explained, ‘It’s important that it be soft and silky.’ He was totally serious.

#872
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He's A Keeper! (37) - Dump His Ass! (11)

Sep 29, 2011 06:01 AM - Misc - by Tara (woman)

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He said, ‘Baby I want to try something. Can I dump my oatmeal on you and eat it off your boobs?'

#871
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He's A Keeper! (22) - Dump His Ass! (16)

Sep 29, 2011 06:01 AM - Misc - by Kimmy (woman)

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On the first date, one guy said, ‘Do you mind if I break wind in front of you?

#870
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He's A Keeper! (10) - Dump His Ass! (41)

Sep 22, 2011 11:54 PM - Misc - by Sam (woman)

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Soon after we first met he said, ‘Please, keep your finger out of my butthole. Some chicks are freaky so I’m just getting it out of the way.'

#869
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He's A Keeper! (37) - Dump His Ass! (10)

Sep 22, 2011 11:54 PM - Misc - by Lisa (woman)

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My ex asked, ‘Did you know that glass is made out of water?

#868
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He's A Keeper! (7) - Dump His Ass! (22)

Sep 22, 2011 11:54 PM - Misc - by Jessica (woman)

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He calls my boobs ‘beerbs’ because when I gain weight, I get bigger boobs instead of a beer belly.

#867
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He's A Keeper! (20) - Dump His Ass! (12)

Sep 22, 2011 11:30 PM - Misc - by Sunny (woman)

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You know how some people call a bra an over-the-shoulder boulder holder? My guy calls mine a ‘pebble holder.'

#866
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He's A Keeper! (5) - Dump His Ass! (51)

Sep 22, 2011 11:30 PM - Misc - by Kathy (woman)

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