The Shit Your BF Says or Does
Advanced Search
Bookmark and Share

Home

|

Keep Him Stories

|

Dump Him Stories

|

Random Stories

|

Submit A Story

|

Moderate

|

ShitMyGFSays.com

Submit Your Story


Your Nickname :
Categories :
Gender? :
Upload Picture:
Email notification ?
Test

Dump Him Stories

Sort: All Time | Today Only | This Week | This Month | This Year


ShitMyBFSays.com Rocks!

#877
1 Comments

He's A Keeper! (7) - Dump His Ass! (5)

Oct 2, 6812 01:20 PM - Misc - by Stickam (woman)

Sign Up for More!

 

I also think of your face. That keeps me running!

#390
0 Comments

He's A Keeper! (2) - Dump His Ass! (4)

Jan 30, 2011 02:20 AM - Health - by Millie (woman)

Sign Up for More!

 

You shouldn't buy me things. Save your money for unicorn rides or whatever it is girls spend money on.

#398
0 Comments

He's A Keeper! (40) - Dump His Ass! (4)

Jan 30, 2011 02:21 AM - Money - by Maya (woman)

Sign Up for More!

 

"I have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my hair trimmer."

#425
0 Comments

He's A Keeper! (25) - Dump His Ass! (4)

Jan 30, 2011 05:31 AM - Sex - by Merriam (woman)

Sign Up for More!

 

Today I was at a video game store. The kid in front of me was about 13 and trading in some games. The clerk opened a game case and the kid’s weed stash fell out. His mom was standing right next to him.

#842
0 Comments

He's A Keeper! (1) - Dump His Ass! (4)

Aug 10, 2011 08:45 AM - Work - by DorkGF (woman)

Sign Up for More!

 

I found out my little sister was a stripper. At the same time, she found out that when I said I was having a "quiet birthday with some friends," what I really meant was "hiring a stripper to jump out of a cake." Wasn't a pretty picture... :(

#845
0 Comments

He's A Keeper! (6) - Dump His Ass! (4)

Aug 10, 2011 08:45 AM - Drunk - by StrippersSuckNow (woman)

Sign Up for More!

 

One night I was leaning on his stomach and I guess my elbow was digging into him. He told me, 'Babe, get up. You're hurting my ovaries.' I think he was serious and I couldn't help but burst out laughing.

#856
0 Comments

He's A Keeper! (25) - Dump His Ass! (4)

Sep 22, 2011 11:24 PM - Misc - by Christine (woman)

Sign Up for More!

 


God I love America.

#428
0 Comments

He's A Keeper! (10) - Dump His Ass! (3)

Jan 30, 2011 05:52 AM - Health - by FattiesAreFunny (woman)

Sign Up for More!

 

The other day in Biology, my teacher tried to explain that semen is comprised mostly of sugar, a blonde girl in the back pipes up “then why does it taste so salty?” She promptly ran out of the classroom with the reddest face. So happy you aren't that stupid, baby!

#841
0 Comments

He's A Keeper! (11) - Dump His Ass! (3)

Aug 10, 2011 08:44 AM - Sex - by Ashley (woman)

Sign Up for More!

 

I'm Asian and I have the "Asian Glow" every time I drink. The other day my boyfriend told me, if we ever got stranded in an island, he would keep feeding me alcohol so I will glow and keep it warm for both of us.

#900
0 Comments

He's A Keeper! (20) - Dump His Ass! (3)

Dec 20, 2011 06:50 AM - Love - by nguyent12 (woman)

Sign Up for More!

 

Courting him with sour patch kids, you ho! (after I gave a lil kid some food).

#391
0 Comments

He's A Keeper! (7) - Dump His Ass! (2)

Jan 30, 2011 02:20 AM - Kids - by Melissa (woman)

Sign Up for More!

 


"Wanna try this position tonight?"

#420
0 Comments

He's A Keeper! (20) - Dump His Ass! (2)

Jan 30, 2011 04:35 AM - Sex - by Ellen (woman)

Sign Up for More!

 

A Man At The Gym Asks His Trainer " Which Machine Do I Need To Use In Order To Attract All The Beautiful Women " The Trainer Responds " The ATM Machine Outside "

#604
0 Comments

He's A Keeper! (21) - Dump His Ass! (2)

Oct 2, 2579 01:09 PM - Money - by Allen Analian (man)

Sign Up for More!

 

So, my boyfriend was out of town for a few days to visit a college buddy of his... I get a text at 12:15am that says "Baby! I saw a tree that had a knot that looked like a vagina. I thought of you." Greeaatt.

#837
0 Comments

He's A Keeper! (18) - Dump His Ass! (2)

Aug 10, 2011 08:44 AM - Sex - by Annie (woman)

Sign Up for More!

 

As I was walking into a convenience store, I held the door for a middle aged woman who was walking up. She said "Don't hold the door because I’m a woman!". I responded with "It's because you’re old." The look on her face and the laughing clerk was priceless.

#844
0 Comments

He's A Keeper! (27) - Dump His Ass! (2)

Aug 10, 2011 08:45 AM - Work - by MenopauseHits (woman)

Sign Up for More!

 

As I was waiting on line at a store, I noticed the cashier had a British accent. When it was my turn, I faked a British accent in conversation. He asked me where I was from, so I admitted that I was faking. His British accent disappeared as he said, "Me too."

#847
0 Comments

He's A Keeper! (45) - Dump His Ass! (2)

Aug 10, 2011 08:45 AM - Drunk - by GirlsLoveFakeBrits (woman)

Sign Up for More!

 

I was sitting on the couch wrapped up in a blanket and he said, completely seriously, 'If you were a burrito, I'd eat you.' He thought it was such a sexy line.

#853
0 Comments

He's A Keeper! (27) - Dump His Ass! (2)

Sep 22, 2011 11:24 PM - Misc - by Bree (woman)

Sign Up for More!

 

My man and I were out for a romantic brunch at this nice restaurant and he ordered a fruit parfait. When he was finished he said, 'It would have been better without the cantaloupe and antelope.' Turns out he meant honey dew.

#855
0 Comments

He's A Keeper! (12) - Dump His Ass! (2)

Sep 22, 2011 11:24 PM - Misc - by Jordan (woman)

Sign Up for More!

 

Look at this shit sucker. Or as they say in Mexico, chuprakaka.

#394
0 Comments

He's A Keeper! (5) - Dump His Ass! (1)

Jan 30, 2011 02:20 AM - Misc - by Shannon (woman)

Sign Up for More!

 

"Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable."

#412
0 Comments

He's A Keeper! (13) - Dump His Ass! (1)

Jan 30, 2011 03:00 AM - Drunk - by Stephanie (woman)

Sign Up for More!

 

Your Account
Username: Password:  Remember Me
Sign Up - Forgot?

Connect
Entertane